Some Random Thoughts Before Answering More Readers…

A post from Tina:

I’m fascinated by your description of the Internet as “cold chaos.” Although (perhaps because) I’ve worked in technology for the last 20 years, I see its limitations; I’m disturbed that few others seem to. Here in the Bay Area, people seem to see  technology as the silver bullet that will fix all our problems, including public education.  Just replace the teachers (being human, they must be the problem, right?) with laptops loaded with corporate content. People also seem to feel that online interaction is an adequate substitute for face time. I fear that the Internet is starving our spiritual need for community.

My reply:

Hi Tina
It’s such a weird feeling I got when I first went onto the internet. I’m actually very left brained as well as right and was working in computer animation during the early 1990s. So the internet was sort of an exciting idea. I had a friend who was a big champion of it but when I logged on, as I said I felt this very creepy, cold void as if there was an alien intelligence that seemed very connected to the shadow side of us, rather than the conscious side. Of course that seemed to be what took off first, pornography, voyeurism and it unleashed this strange (now cultural) narcissism that I think was contained in people through direct interaction with others.

IT felt like we were going to meet our shadow on the other end of that line and it really scared me. The other thing that struck me was attached it seemed to be the energy of chaos, I mean in the universal way, often seen in ancient cultures as a force for evil. And of course it was the final wall that ripped down public and private life, which I’m not sure was such a great thing.

Perhaps one day we will be able to fit all these things back together and elevate it all to a better place but for now we seem to be having trouble with the darker side of this phenomena. It seems to have way too much power on the way people think and feel and I believe it contributes to the delusions we have about the economy, jobs and the stock market.

I know it sounds strange, but there is so much information out there, yet very little of it is really checked like it used to be in the old days, by multiple sources. Blogs are opinion based, and often based on half-baked information, and traditional media outlets are going more toward copying the editorial style of blogs. We’ve nearly lost the 4th estate. We have no one to really put the government’s feet to the fire and those that are trying to do it are doing it with mid-evil methods and coo-coo statistics.

We are more divided, less tolerant and the dark sides of who were seems to be overshadowing the light. It’s interesting to note all the Celestial bodies that have been discovered since the turn of this century and how kind of creepy most of their legends are. Almost all appear to be dealing with the shadow side of our nature. (I am actually working on making a list of these planetoids and their dark rulerships to be released in the future.)

To get back to what Tina said. It’s a HORRIBLE mistake to let computers become teachers. And I’m also against testing teachers and children like they are robots. If we can’t come up with an organic, holistic way to determine what kids are getting out of school and what teachers are doing, than something is wrong! The people who are in charge are not checking in on the classrooms, aren’t listening to parents, and aren’t taking into consideration other types of development. Sometimes, I think we’ve forgotten how to be human and it’s just as important to teach theater, expressing one’s feelings, art, music, political science, critical thinking, as it is to teach math and reading.

I have a sibling who is severely dyslexic. We were opposites. I was in gifted classes, they were in special ed. We were both freaks on the opposite end of the spectrum. My sibling has a very high IQ but their condition wasn’t fully understood. It’s now coming to light that people with dyslexia have a different kind of brain – one that sees literally in 3-D, and so words – which on a page are 2-D, are an impossible jumble. My sibling never really learned how to read and write past the 1st grade level (until they went away to a special school in their 20s that approached things in a radical new way). Yet my sibling is actually very brilliant and can take build anything, figure anything out, has the mind of an engineer. I wonder what the schools we went to would do with a kid like that now when they have to take those “every child left behind” (pun intended) tests. It would make it look like those teacher sucked.

My point is different kids learn differently and forcing children to reguritate information onto a test to satisfy some quota isn’t good education, it’s good martial training. And it’s really stupid.

By the way I read an interesting article in “The Mountain Astrologer,” for those of you who don’t know about this magazine and are interested in astrology, it is by far the best of the best – there was an interview with Carolyn Myss who is a sort of New Age guru. I kind of stay away from New Age stuff, but I started listening to her Sacred Contracts lecture on tape and agreed with a lot of it, some of it struck me as a bit nutty. And I found her a bit full of herself and someone with a kind of a angry, arrogant energy that turned me off. I really don’t like it when people make up systems and seem like they’re winging half of it, and while I thought she had tapped into some truths, I felt a lot of it was sort of recycled from other metaphysical sources or could be found via other places, not to say she didn’t believe she invented it. I just have read a lot of occult books and have studied spiritual ideas outside the mainstream for a long time and had heard what she put forward said many ways, many times, with many different twists before. But it’s always good, however to make it new and get people thinking so I was happy to see her books do well as they undoubtedly made people open to new ideas which is always an excellent accomplishment.

It’s also my opinion that anyone who is that sure of themselves is invariably wrong about a lot because while one must invest in their ideas, one also has to remain open. And one never has all the answers, as soon as one thinks this, one is crushed by reality by the Universe.

Also being a double Aquarius I have a natural distrust of authority and I really don’t like being put in the position of guru which was why I originally left the practice of reading for people. I’m not always right. If one changes their path the outcome will change, which in my opinion is the reason readings are valuable, so one can correct their path.  I’m not omnipotent and I can’t control fate. It’s an unfortunate side-effect of the work that people want to turn you into a guru or a god. For example when reading some people they will argue and try to convince me why what I’m telling them shouldn’t be (as if I can change the outcome of their path!) I’m psychic not God!

Unfortunately, psychics themselves can get caught up in this power trip (which I’ve seen) and it’s really not cool to say the least. That was what ran me out of the work. While I wanted people to listen to what I was saying and take it seriously so they could change their future for the better, I didn’t want them to be under the illusion that I was anything more than a messenger. These lines do however get blurred for some people and that made me uncomfortable. I really didn’t want to turn into a “Spiritual Leader” at 22 years old. I was wise enough to know I didn’t really know anything. However now I understand things more clearly and feel more comfortable relaying the messages I get, mostly because I understand them now! But still I’m just the messenger! This was my problem with Myss in a nutshell, she kind of had to much ego about the whole thing which in my opinion dulls the ability – kind of like what I suspect happened to Sylvia Brown, maybe she was psychic at one point, now she’s just an egomaniac.

However, in this article Myss mentioned that before every expansion of her psychic ability she would have a run on grand mal seizures and then they would go away when her new abilities opened up. Unlike, Myss I was born psychic however like Myss I have experienced this same phenomena. (We are also both from Chicago. Supposedly, a place where more psychics are born than an place else – although I didn’t read the book about the subject.)

I had a grand mal seizure when I was 17 which was just after a major surgery and I was put into a drug induced coma, which was really awful, within a year of that experience my psychic abilities, which I had tried to suppress (due to being an adolescent just trying to fit in, instead of being called, witch and freak) broke open like a damn and I really thought I would die as a result of the enormous, wild, intense energy that felt as though it would engulf me. I worried (with good reason) that I would turn into a human fire-ball (not to mention many other extraordinarily bizarre events). My psychic ability was in control of me rather than the other way around. I had to find a teacher and when I was 18 that’s what I did.

Again, when I had my daughter and my abilities became more integrated and changed form, I too suffered from (this time a series of) both grand-mal and petite-mal seizures. So I think Myss’ is onto something here. I think there is some sort of wiring or neurological component to being psychic. Like that reader who could put his hand on the electric fence, some of us, perhaps are truly wired differently.

As another note, I’m currently watching Nightline Primetime special about the brain. I’ve read research on the topic they are covering as well – there is a lot of evidence to suggest people who are violent offenders have disturbance, damage or are born with problems in the frontal lobe many become killers/serial murders and mass murderers.

Interestingly, they not on the program that this lack of energy in the frontal lobe, which indicates murderers is also seen in people obsessed with religion in a zealot like way – perhaps this is why religious wars and suicide bombers exist. This research seconds my feeling that those who voraciously cling to religious zealotry do so because they don’t feel an internal moral compass. People with frontal lobe issues may need to have rules and regulations and a prescription for how to live a normal life and fit in. And perhaps having a strong traditional religion where they are fortified in their belief and kept in line by a large group they can belong to, also helps them keep it together.

Another interesting article I read recently in Discover was about the shrinkage of the human brain in the past 10,000, which as it turns out has been quite substantial. Some have put forth a dumbing down theory. My belief (which is also another scientific theory with some modification on my part) is we have become domesticated and no longer need to have this over-developed aggressiveness (domesticated animals’ brains shrink over  a period of 12 generations) also we are more specialized in what we do, therefore streamlining our brains and probably creating a different sort of wiring that is more complex, sensitive and different. As it turns out there are many animals who have “small” brains, but research has shown they are actually as, or more intelligent than animals with much larger brains he size. It’s not how big,  it’s how the thing is built. My laptop is more powerful than the a thousand NASA computers from the 1960s and it is certainly much smaller!

Interestingly, the theory that prevailed in the 1990s that we would become one light-coffee colored homogenized group (think of the Benetton Ads which were based on this theory of the future – now not talked about much due to scientists’ fears of dealing with all the racial politics, although again this is silly as we can all be equal and not the same but anyway…) as people intermarried. In actuality we have become less like each other.  There are more differences between races, in terms of physical structure and performance on various tests than before, all of these things are indicitive of finding one’s niche and passing it along to one’s prodgeney. And perhaps the areas we grow up in due to our race, or the opportunities we are given due to our ethnicity. And of course we are much bigger than all of that and break out of every rule put on us and people are so much more than any of these things.

I’ve often thought that our DNA is actually an internal tape recorder – that what we do in our lives gets encoded and those talents get passed along. Why else would some have a talent for music, art, math? None of these things are necessary for immediate survival, one can’t draw oneself out of starvation or sing themself out of being eaten by wolves.  Yet one can not deny that seemingly learned traits get passed on, often skipping generations which means it can’t be entirely attributed to one’s environment.

We are clearly a mix of so many complex elements, our environment, our genes, our soul, our past lives (in my opinion), our point on the wheel of individuation – that there will never be simple answers to anything. Some people will rise above mental illness or indications that they should be sociopaths – compassion will develop in a different part of the brain and compensate. Some people will have everything they need to become schizophrenic except it will never be triggered due to the luck of growing up in a happy home and having a very stable environment until the point of the trigger is rendered moot. We are complex beings, spiritual, emotional, physical, metaphysical and  multi-dimensional.

I will continue answering the rest of the questions throughout the week. When I’m done I’ll open it back up to people who need help. But make sure to check because I’m just going to do it for a day next time and then answer what I can, and close it down. I’ll keep doing this for until I don’t have time.

Many blessings and best wishes to all,

Denise

Answering Readers…

Another question, here it is:

Dear Denise, my fiance frequently visits your site and passes on very interesting information to me and has suggested I seek some information into an interesting aspect of myself that I discovered this past week….My friend has a solar powered 110 volt electric fence to protect his garden. One of our friends accidentally touched it and got a decent little shock a which turned us all into curious adolescents.

We dared each other and ourselves to touch it, and everyone got a good shock but me.  I could and can, as I just did it again tonight, grab the fence and hold it with almost no sensation at all except feeling a slight pulse of it on my fingers when I grip it.

One of the kickers, is that my friends touched me to see if I was really gripping the fence and attached to the current and it knocked them to their knees several times each and gave me a slightly greater pulse of electricity through my body.  We sat around in amazement the rest of the night trying to figure out what was going on and I grabbed, held, and swayed the activated fence around numerous times throughout the night with no affect on me.

I went back tonight to see if the other night was some wild unexplainable anomaly, really expecting to get shocked, and again it had no affect on me and actually even less as I didn’t even feel the pulse on my fingers or palm. my friends and I are bewildered. Just wondering if you have any idea why/what this might be?  Knowing that you have some experience with unexplained phenomena I thought you might be a good person to ask.
don’t know if you need DOB: but it is Jan 15, 1974 6:58 a.m. Ogdensburg NY

Hey there,

As I suspected you have some neurological stuff. You are literally wired differently. (I actually have this weird thing about watches and those magnetic drawing toys – watches die after a week of wear, and I can draw with just my finger, I attributed this to being an alien or more likely a weird form of neurological problem which I do know empirically, I have).

You actually have a lot of planets in Libra, and Aquarius, and the ruler of your chart Jupiter is in the sign of Aquarius, plus you have Gemini conjunct your South Node in Gemini. You have a loose grand air trine. On the cusp of your 6th house (health) you have Gemini and that is ruled by Mercury, your Mercury is conjunct your Sun. You have Moon and Uranus conjunct in Libra and Jupiter and Venus in Aquarius.  Saturn is in Gemini conjunct your descendant and South Node. You also have Pluto conjunct your part of Fortune in Libra in your 9th house.

Interestingly the only earth you have (you have absolutely no water in your chart – I have absolutely no fire) and other than your Sun conjunct Mercury in Capricorn (which are so close to the end of the sign, almost in Aquarius – an air sign) and Mars at an early degree of Taurus, you have very little earth. You are basically a human lightening rod with so much air and fire. The earth seems to act like a small electrical ground. You are a human conduit, like a jumble of wires and signals, you have this intensely air based chart despite being a Capricorn.

OK, so, you are an extremely heady guy, super bright and wired differently than most. I also think you have a gift for some forms of psychic ability, especially premonitions and telepathy, as I have found people with a lot air in their charts receive ideas through the ether in unusual ways. You may even think they are your original ideas when you are tapping into something bigger than you. If you meditate or try to do so (it won’t be easy for you with so much stuff rumbling through your brain at a thousand miles a second – what my Western Esoteric teacher called “monkey chatter”) you can actually learn to spot those wild beasts thundering through the jungle of your mind – meaning you can actually learn to tell what’s emanating from you and what you are receiving, but this will take practice, patience and most likely involve keeping a journal.

Once you learn to identify thoughts that are not coming from you, but rather those that you are receiving you can learn to trace them (like an intuitive blood hound) and later you will be able to tap directly into the Over-Soul or Collective Unconscious, and come up with the next logic step in technology, which could lead to either inventing something or since you have Saturn in Gemini on your descendant writing a best-selling book – because you will be tapped in. Whatever way you manifest being tapped in, it is a skill that is hugely helpful in all fields and careers. Just use your power for good and not evil!

Perhaps you’ve felt like an extraterrestrial. Perhaps you are eccentric, unusual or what some would say kind of weird, but I mean that in the loveliest of ways. You are very, kind, compassionate, fair and humanitarian.  Like I said you are literally wired different from other people, but do me a favor don’t push your luck and keep putting your hand on the electric fence! It will eventually do damage to you, especially with Mercury ruling your 6th house – you have to be careful of neurological problems, problems with your arms, lungs and mind. Also right now Mercury is retrograde and you might have a different result that isn’t very pleasant as unexpected things happen when Mercury is retrograde and now that you’ve established this as your normal it might reverse itself. Another possibility is that you started doing this when Mercury was retrograde and the ability might not be there when it goes direct again. Mercury went retrograde around the 20th of August. So be careful when Mercury goes direct, just in case your internal poles have shifted.

Hope this answers your question for now! And by all means if you do, do it again, you should charge people to see it! And also put it on U-tube. I’d like to see it. Let us know what happens.

Best to you,

Denise

Another Question and Answer (this one applies to everyone)

From a reader:

Denise,
Our community’s position/predicament and then my question….
Thoughts
I’m a 65 yr. older guy (a former teacher) who’s take on the economic recovery is tempered by both optimism and years of patience.

My wife and I, both empty nesters, live in a small community of about 10,000.

The economic “bail-outs” were/are intended to have an eventual trickle down flow of monies and confidence to the people.

It is very difficult for my wife and I and many of our close blue-collar friends (NOT rich/wealthy/well-to-do people) to believe or convince ourselves that a total or even meaningful recovery will happen soon, since the mass economic downturns that we all find ourselves sharing is many years in the making.

Yet, it seems as if a large number of folks expect miracles in the short to medium term.

Most of us still have work, which runs the gambit of part-time restaurant workers (me) to office workers, struggling small business owners, truck and cab drivers, and $16/hr. chefs and $10/hr. (plus tips) waitresses.
Question
Will patience and optimism eventually prevail to help guide us into a better future as envisioned by our new administration?
Thx

This is an excellent question and one that I’m sure everyone has thought about at one point or another the past couple of years. And my answer is complicated so here goes…

We are facing a paradigm shift, not just in how our countrymen have lived in the last century, but one on a much deeper level. Reality tells us there are limited resources – current research shows  it literally would take one and a half earths to sustain the lifestyles we have become accustomed to. If one takes into account the loss of jobs to China and the restructuring of how we do business that started to happen 30 or more years ago, we can see a flaw in the logic of our politicians at the time, who may have thought they were positioning us to be the bosses and intellectual captains of industry of the world. However, as we know no-one country can guarantee this to all of its people, we all have different gifts and to rely on an economy where we come up with the ideas and have other people produce them may have seemed like a good idea when the dot-com economy was booming. However we aren’t all meant to be inventors or captains of industry, even on a small scale.

We championed this new Skymall (the internet), however that’s really all it has amounted to in terms of dollars and sense. If anything it has caused a horrible spiral of deflation where people (in order to get the internet going) do more work and often for free in order to compete. People also take what used to be paid for – the very intellectual property that was supposed to be the back bone of this new economy. We don’t pay for music, films, ideas (I blog for free and many others who would probably be publishing books, instead now put their work out for no money). The good side of this is it broke down the very narrow gates and allowed each individual to play the role of gatekeeper.

However, it has literally broken the back of the middle-class people which has always relied on being paid for services rendered. For example this person is a retired teacher, perhaps instead of waiting tables this person could have tutored students part-time – they would have made better money, and it would have been less taxing physically, but because their neighbor the journalist no longer works for the paper (you can get all that news stuff on-line for free), the journalist can’t afford a tutor, let alone her mortgage. And the lawyer who would have made a comfortable living doing basic services like drawing up wills – well, there is Legal Zoom for that. The musician who goes on the road can no longer make money as people aren’t coming out (sales in this industry are down about a third from a couple of years ago). And all the major labels have collapsed, they don’t actually offer people money anymore to do deals (from the people I know who have been given offers). They also have no real foothold or power to distribute and radio’s back has been broken, first with the inception of Clear Channel which tried to control everything in old-fashioned Robber Barron monopoly style – this backfired due to XM and the internet and so on and so forth. The domino effect has been enormous.

All this is actually because after the rush into this new technology (the internet) and the ridiculously over-bloated expectations that came with it, “the bubble” as it was called on Wall Street, behind it all was a cold beast – a new paradigm we all rushed into without sorting out first. We are currently in the wild west without a Sheriff and while people have tried to “monetize” the internet, those attempts have been far too late and far too lame so far. It’s also pretty hard to monetize something when people have gotten used to getting that service or product for free and we are in a downward spiral of deflation.

Here’s the thing though, the internet does have amazing potential – the problem was, we rushed after this future and then were sent back 5 steps to the old economy we’d had during the Cold War, and all the advances were frozen – no one stepped forward to regulate or help organize this new economic world mall. Only those that followed a relatively conventional version of the new paradigm thrived, retails, wholesalers, people who already had built-in systems to deal with what this was – a new way to sell stuff or E-Bay which was based on the old paradigm of the auction.

Problem is all those who controlled intellectual property blew it off, the publishers, music industry, the film/TV industry. Instead of embracing MP3s when they first came out, and figuring out how to monetize this technology and get it under control, they ignored it. Instead of newspapers like the LA Times figuring out how to get online subscriptions up and expanding their staffs to check out stories on the internet, perhaps show that they had something real to offer and respond to or find a new way to do their job like focusing on more in depth reportage, stuff you can’t easily find online or some other new niche, they too ignored it until they were (and are) being replaced by it.

You get the picture.

And when you have one government (the Clinton Administration) setting our country up to be the purveyors of content, invention and intellectual property (which has its own set of problems like this is not for everyone just because they were born in the USA and limiting people’s options is always stupid) we dipped our toe in the water and got scared and ran back to our towels on the beach.

All of this, shipping jobs overseas, not controlling this new economic paradigm, burying our head in the sand (which is currently being done right now on the stock market, by the way, just as it was during the 90s so look for another rectification there) all leads to no jobs and deflation. And to answer the age-old debate, which is worse inflation or deflation? Hands down, deflation. Because deflation is what undeveloped nations deal with. People working their butts off for no money and not being able to pay anyone else for their work. That’s a lot worse than everyone’s salary and housing steadily going up 5% or whatever.

I know out of control inflation is also horrible, however, the course we are on is deflation. Meaning we are going to have to downsize our lives, we are going to have to stop living in this over-bloated consumerist way. We are going to learn to be happy with the little things and count our blessings and watch our money. It’s not fun, but we put ourselves in this position by being greedy, shortsighted and self-centered (I’m not talking about the average person, I’m talking about those who had the power to do the right thing but didn’t) and now we are all suffering for it.

I remember the first time I logged onto the internet in 1994. It was still very unorganized and nothing like it is now. I felt this very cold chaos on the other end, and I stayed away from it for a long time after that because it felt very creepy to me. I think I was  picking up on all that would be lost as a result of it and all that would change. I’m not saying the internet is bad, in fact I love it now that it is more organized. But I am saying that we rushed in where we should have tread lightly and had a battle plan. I just don’t think we knew what we were unleashing here and it will take us a long time to figure this new business paradigm out, at least for the remainder of Pluto being in Capricorn, until around 2024. This is going to be a long painful process. I’m not saying everything will be horrible it will just be a very unstable financial period, especially for big business which unfortunately has been ruling the world for the past several decades if not more.

If we want to make things better sooner, the best way to do so would be to break up the big corporations and look for solutions via regulation, to make sure people get paid fairly for whatever they contribute, but the likelihood of this happening is not great right now. I think Obama is keeping things status quo which is better than letting everything plunge into a dark abyss. I see him as a pilot using all his might to keep the airplane on course through a terrible storm, but even after he lands the plane this situation or storm will still be going on and it is imperative that whoever is elected next has a clear plane to get above the clouds and not be talked down into that storm by anyone, no matter how powerful.

Obama is pretty much what I first felt about him. I wish he could and would (or will) surprise us with living up to his greater nature instead of letting fear, power and insecurity keep him in a janitorial position rather than in a leadership role. He certainly has the intellect and capacity to be great. But my fear (which is why I voted for Hilary in the primary – probably couldn’t tell that from my blog) was that he is too reasonable and we are not in reasonable times. Sometimes we must take a stand, a strong one and take the heat that goes with it. Sometimes we are forced to fight and be strong when protecting those who can not protect themselves. In my opinion this is the main job of being president – to protect the people from those who would exploit or hurt them – that means all people, the rich, the poor, the religious, the atheists, the jerks, the saints, the sinners.

Our country is a melting pot for all human beings of the world, a place were we are all guaranteed freedoms that have been slowly whittled away by that wealthy one percent – who by the way are doing just great, unlike the rest of us.

And so to answer the question more directly, the only way we can truly get out of this is to face reality, tighten our belt, and count our blessings. Being positive, thinking positive and connecting to one’s higher power are excellent personal ways to get through this and of course being kind to others will help as well.

We will actually be OK, it’s just going to take a lot of people doing a lot of thinking and inventing and putting plans into action with the help of visionaries and those who would back visionaries in their plans. I actually believe this is the lesser version of that which we had sown. And I believe we will get it together because I do believe that the vast majority of human beings are truly good even if they don’t always do the right thing.

I believe we are all divine and have tremendous untapped power. If we tap into it to help, even in the smallest of ways, we will lift ourselves to a better place than we were before all this began.

Many blessings,

Denise

And the Next One..,

From a reader:

HI: Thank for your generous offer to answer a simple question. I’ve been feeling insanely confused on the direction of my life, especially with my career. I really hate my job and know in my heart that I should be doing something else?  The problem is I have many interest.

If i find another job will it be a risk to leave a job that is so steady? Or is a risk what I need in my life?

Right now my cardinal climax makes total sense for me. Pluto is transiting my 1st house – This has me questioning all my relationships. Uranus is transiting my 3rd house -Saturn is transiting your 9th and 10th houses –

OK, firstly I want to say you have a grand water trine with the Moon involved.  You have Uranus conjunct your Moon trine Venus in Pisces and loosely trine Mercury in Pisces and tightly trine your Moon and both your Uranus and Venus are trine Mars in the 7th house. You have both Mercury and Venus and your Sun at a very late degree 28 in Pisces, all giving you the gift or second sight, whether you have control of it or not is your decision but you have the raw talent to be extraordinarily gifted in this respect. Interestingly you have Neptune in your 12 in Sag, only reinforcing the psychic ability but for you it would be best to go through a system not from your family of origin, meaning you should study Buddhism or something else foreign if you were raised Catholic and vice versa if you were raised or grew up in an environment that was eastern based. Your chart is actually quite similar to mine although you are a bit more balanced than I but as I am missing fire you are missing earth, entirely. I was told many years ago by a fellow astrologer that when this occurs it is because one has worked through that energy in past lives and comes into this world with an excess of that energy therefore you choose not to have any planets in that element to compensate for this intensity. People have always thought I was some sort of fire sign, especially in my youth and I’m sure people conceive you (wrongly) as some kind of earth mamma. You are incredibly sensitive and with Saturn in Cancer in your 7th house and Pluto culminating in Libra from your 9th at the cusp of your 10th, I wonder if you ever considered a career in family law? Fighting for the underprivileged and eventually getting into politics? This would be a tremendous use of your deep compassion, although you often hide it and show it erratically especially in relationship to your career which you take very personally. You want to help out humanity in a big way and you should, for you are a very old soul often overwhelmed with your feelings of grief for this world. You are lucky to have come from a home that confirmed your individuality, although your parents may have fought sometime but it looks like they always found a way to work it out. Interestingly  you internalized their arguing by being overly diplomatic and by tiptoeing around things a bit, often creeping sideways when trying to assert yourself. People with this much Pisces in their charts have difficult lives (in general) even if nothing “horrible” happened to them in their early life, they are so extraordinarily sensitive the smallest thing is a 1000 times worse for them to endure. They also have a tendency to self-pity and may think things were worse than they were when compared to other people’s experiences. And with the moon in Scorpio conjunct Uranus it will cause one to suppress feelings or make one uncomfortable about telling others about oneself (it’s in the 11th so this is especially true for you with friends and of course with Uranus there this is reinforced in career as well).  You have a penchant for the occult, clearly with so much water in your chart and even from your question, you knew much more about your chart than the average person.  You have Sun and Mercury in the third house with Venus close from the 2nd house cusp, meaning you manifest your spirituality and psychic ability through your mind and perhaps dismiss your abilities to some extent. With Libra ruling your 10th house and Venus in Pisces in he 2nd I really think you would (and Pluto so close, the most elevated planet in your chart) it seems you should either do something creative for a career but it has to have mass appeal or you need to get involved in politics and law (ultimately).

As for your question let’s follow your career path by depositor down the line: Your tenth house (career) is ruled by Venus. You have Venus in Pisces and therefore your Venus is ruled by Neptune in Sagittarius in the 12th and Jupiter in Aries in the 4th Pisces has both as co-rulers. You have Pluto culminating at the top of your chart in Libra, again reinforcing Venus which is ruled by Pisces. Saturn which is the natural ruler of the 10th is in Cancer, your Moon is in Scorpio conjunct Uranus both ruled by Pluto in Libra and Mars (again co-ruler) in Cancer.

To clear up all that confusion, You need to do something on a large-scale, with mass appeal. You have a lot of things that lead me to believe you have a political bent and your destiny lies in incorporating other cultures. You have tremendous insight, a natural ability for psychology and are highly sensitive. You need to move the world in a big way and you, I can see why you are confused because these energies don’t jump out at one with a specific easy answer. On the cusp of your second house is Capricorn which is ruled by Cancer again the moon is involved, again you will probably change jobs a lot in your lifetime and it is my opinion the more I look at your chart you are meant to do a lot of things and learn many skills because perhaps what you are meant to do does not entirely exist yet, it will be something you will sort of invent. Or be part of a new revolution. So for now follow your heart get a job helping people, perhaps working for a charity for women as Pluto will be making a sextile to your Venus in your 2nd house and has just finished opposing your Mars in the 7th house, making working with abused women and children or for an organization who helps them. The other thing here is that you have Mercury ruling your 6th, you could do some writing which you are good at which could earn some money or sales for now. You can really do anything, your chart is set up to be used for many different types of careers which is why you are confused and why I’m not much help because as I said, what your really meant to do hasn’t completely come into being yet. So follow your heart, your intuition. You may have an opportunity through a sibling coming up that could work out well for now.

Don’t try to figure it all out right now over time things will become clear. Just do what you are called to do for the time being, you need to learn and grow in many ways. Just go along for the ride and try not to worry. I know it’s not easy but I’ve given you some clues to follow and if you bear those in mind you will find your way.

Oh and with Pluto going through your house now (for forever!) this will cause an identity crisis. You have to push past its influence and connect to your spiritual self, your higher self to get around it and even still it is powerful and it will mess with your head especially since you are naturally ambitious and it has such a strong hold in your natal chart. You are meant to be in a position of power or government that much I’m very certain.

OK, I got another e-mail from this person and it gave me some more impressions which I will share here:

Something about this e-mail made me feel you have been in the business world, a world that doesn’t fit you. You’ve had to pretend to be someone you aren’t. And it’s driving you crazy! Meaning it’s putting stress on you and making you lose faith in yourself, in the world and in your connection to the higher power as well as keeping you in survival mode. Perhaps this has been going on for so long now that you don’t know who you are but don’t lose heart because you can’t be lost when you own your power and have faith in yourself, something you haven’t done in a while.

Many blessings to you,

Denise

OK… Soon there will be more…

OK for now I’m closed down as I have a lot of questions to answer over the next couple of weeks. But for those of you who need help.

I will make this offer again in the future, it will be reserved for those who haven’t had my help before.

I will post some new answers to readers questions soon, either tonight or tomorrow. I have been working on things.

Best to all,

Denise

So basically if you haven’t e-mailed me yet with a question, the door is closed for now until I can answer everyone else.

Next Question…

From a Reader:

Hi Denise,

I would like to take you up on the offer for some guidance on getting out of this home business lack of good consistent cashflow I’ve been having that has put me in a rut the past few years, if not more overall.  I’m staying mentally strong but really would like some insight as things have taken a very rough turn recently.

After looking at your chart it makes perfect sense you’d have a home business. You have Sun which rules your 10th house of career in your 4th house of your home. However, it makes perfect sense you would be having probably the worst time ever in your working life since perhaps you set out as a young person. You have Pluto transiting your 2nd house of work creating what is called a T-Square between your north node and part of fortune in your 5th house and your Uranus, south node and Jupiter in Libra in your 11th house, all of this probably followed a rough patch starting in the winter of 2005 and going on and off for a few years. This would have been when Pluto was going through your 2nd house squaring Pluto in your 11th house.

Friends at that time probably let you down, perhaps one worked for you and messed you up, or your wishes for your business didn’t materialize in the way you had expected, or a combination of both. In order to make things work you would have had to take control yourself, perhaps restructure things and rely more on a partner when you hadn’t before. I  imagine this was probably a romantic relationship but it could have been a business partner, that you fell back on which you didn’t want to do for  many reasons, however, it was the right move and paid off.

This could very well have been when you started the business or it took of and you had to make serious adjustments to keep up, but none the less it was fraught with anxiety and trouble with someone who was supposed to be a friend.

Now with Pluto reeking havoc it is putting strain on your partnership and on your ability to see a creative way out which you usually have no problem doing as you are gifted that way.  You are truly a go getter, an entrepreneur and will make mountains move under normal circumstances. Others admire this amazing ability you have to realize your dreams in ways they can only imagine, yet here you are with Pluto screwing all that up! All of this would have started around the time of the stock market crash and you have seen up and down months ever since as Pluto goes back and forth creating this T-Square. Everything has been very unstable.

For you all of this was a very personal – the crash hugely impacted what you do for your business in a way that it didn’t (directly that is) for most people. Well, luckily for you Pluto will make its last transit this November and then be on its way, meaning you aren’t out of the woods, but you soon will be. Once you have that monster off your back, you will probably physically feel your body unwind. December of 2010 it will be personally past reeking havoc in your chart for a while.

But don’t get, too, cocky because it will hit your Saturn and Venus in the 6th house again effecting work, your career and relationship in about eight years. If you learn your lessons here and prepare for this however you can use this energy to your advantage and again re-envision yourself, this time with the help of very powerful friends (there will be a nice trine from Pluto at the time to your natal Pluto in Virgo). This will bring about a whole new world of opportunities much bigger than anything you will have ever dealt with, but it will also be a hard shift in your life and you’ll have to brace yourself for that aspect of it.

OK, I don’t normally do this (especially with no information about a person other than their first name and birth date) but I can’t shake this, you really have to be careful about your marriage at that time. Remember what I’m saying here and don’t do anything silly, think of your wife and children and wait out that period of time, meaning don’t do anything regarding leaving your wife or something until after 2020, if you’re still feeling it then go for it, the transit will have passed. And if something happens on your wife’s end, then work it through and wait it out. Don’t just give up because you’re angry. This is a huge mistake so many people make. None of us are perfect and while you may be saying to yourself  “that will never happen to me,” please just take note and remember to not let yourself be ruled by the pulling apart aspect of Pluto at that time in terms of your personal life. Try to work it out and learn compassion instead and grow from the aspect, you will get so much more for doing so.

Forewarned is forearmed and I myself have found that things really get the energy taken out of them and can be turned to positive ends almost entirely if one is prepared. No one has a perfect life, we all have problems however when you know things are just temporary (and that means good as well as bad) it makes life more precious and a lot easier to weather the bad.

Try not to freak out. You’re going to be OK. Save your money and be very thrifty and conservative. Things will get much better  next year and every month from the beginning on you will feel it getting better.

Hold tight for now, the worst (for you) is almost over, for now.

And to everyone out there just a reality check: Life never stays stationary. It moves forward or backward depending on how you use the energy being sent to you. If you try to keep things the same they explode. Also for every action there is a reaction. We are in a time of reckoning (for the world that is) and our materialism is now being checked by lack. So in your own life make sure from now on not to get caught up in the consumerism of our culture to the degree we all were before. This is a chance to be more responsible with how we go forward and a lesson in the finite world in which we live.

Best to all,

Denise

Next Question and Answer…

The Reader Writes: (4)

Hello, I just have a couple quick questions for you.  I’m currently unemployed, and unsure what to do next. Should I try to find a job now, or should I go get the tech certification I’ve been thinking about, THEN try and find a job with that on my resume?

Also, I’ve struggled with my weight for most of my life, and don’t have very much willpower at all. I’ve tried many different things, and nothing has worked. I’d like to only need one seat on a plane instead of two. How can I lose weight successfully?

I want to address the weight issue because being hard on yourself makes the situation worse. Believe it or not it is not will power. It is much more complicated than that and beating up on yourself only makes things worse, so don’t do that!

Right now I see that you’ve disconnected from your body, there is dark energy around your head, making me think you’ve been in a depression and are going through some sort of dark time, perhaps a grieving process. This darkness has been growing for a long time and is so heavy you can hardly see through it. You are eating without thinking due to this pain. The answer is to deal with the emotional pain, and the feeling of being lost by connecting to your higher self.

I suggest you start praying every night before you go to bed and connect with your version of God, it doesn’t have to be anything you’ve been taught, just the energy of the divine I want you to pray to. I want you to ask for clarity and relief from the darkness. And feel the love, concentrate on the love, feel the warmth (imagine this when you pray) surrounding you and visualize the darkness around your head dissolving with white light.

OK, after running a chart I can see that this individual has several areas in which to work that would be fulfilling and also lucrative. Saturn is the natural ruler of the 10^th house and it is conjunct the Moon in Virgo, so one could be involved with working at as a nurse or in the medical field. Venus rules this person’s 10^th house cusp and being in Scorpio in the 4^th conjunct Mercury and Uranus, leads me more down the direction of working with people in the last stages of their lives, this could be through hospice or through working at a mortuary, or in the innovation side of it with Mercury conjunct Uranus this person is very bright, it could also be a technology job, specifically new technologies and invention.

Actually this person’s chart has very few squares, meaning it is really up to the individual to make things happen, fate will have a minor role as compared to some people whose lives are verging on the pre-planned, this effect can be misinterpreted as laziness. Instead it is more cloudiness or a feeling of being lost most of the time and waiting for a sign to push you but none comes.

This person could have been a very successful scientist with Pluto conjunct the Sun in the 3rd house in Libra (near the fixed star Spica which gives the influence of genius). However it is entirely up to them whether they live up to their full potential or not, like everyone to some extent, but this person has been given the freedom to be sort of left alone by the Universe. This means it’s really entirely up to the person to make their way which can be very difficult and confusing and make a person feel very alone, almost abandoned in a strange sort of way. This person does have the power to plug in and get direction, but their GPS system needs work – they must clear away the intellectual and emotional debris and connect with their higher power, their higher self and by this I don’t mean God as we have been taught about Him/Her. I mean the all powerful force of love that glues everything together.  They must move steadily toward a goal and stay positive even in the face of all disaster.

They mention a weight problem which comes directly from having Jupiter in Virgo in the first house, people with this placement always struggle with their weight because Jupiter lends itself toward over indulgence and it being in Virgo makes it food related.

So to answer the questions specifically I would go for the tech certification and consider the areas I noted if it doesn’t work out long-term for you in the area you are going into right now.

I also feel you really need to work on the spiritual side of your life, you do have your north node in Virgo so you are meant to work in this lifetime in a service sort of situation especially as it is on the cusp of your 1st and 2nd houses. This means your identity and sense of self-worth as well as your income and spiritual purpose will come into focus and move forward when you are working. Your work (in the real world, meaning your job/career) is part of the main reason you are here. You have your south node in Pisces so you have spent many lifetimes where this was not your main focus, but it is very important that you contribute and use the gift of your very able intelligence, actually it is indicated that you are intellectually gifted, but this maybe obscured (to you & by the way they were wrong, you are intellectually gifted) by having grown up with a critical and harsh parent who didn’t reinforce your gifts.
Best wishes and many blessings,
Denise

Next Question: Answering Readers…

Will my youngest son ever get his act together?  Born July 28, 1984.  Married? Job? Not be a bum all his life?  Thank you

I actually don’t think he’s a bum. He has a very difficult chart with so many planets in the 12^th it may seem like he’s lazy but it’s not that simple. He’s actually depressive, suffers from a lot of unconscious fear and feeling lost. He would really love to have a family with so much in Leo, but he’s afraid of being a crappy dad.

He’s afraid of failing, he’s afraid of succeeding and thus he’s stuck in this weird and horrible paradox, trying to stay stationary which of course is impossible.  12^th house stuff is often spiritual in nature and means there are things left over from other lifetimes that still cling to him.

Whatever happened in his childhood (this stuff squares a bunch of planets in his 4^th house) was made more difficult by things that happened while growing up. I’m not saying anyone did anything directly to him it could have been entirely his perception of events – whatever he came into this world with was at odds with what he experienced as a kid and it created more obstacles for him which he has no real handle on.

With Saturn and Mars in the 4^th (both malefic planets) he saw (and then Uranus conjunct his south node in Sag there as well, only reinforcing whatever negative stuff he had from his past lives) he saw the home as full of arguments/anger and a parental figure being very hard on him.  This is square his Sun and Moon – both in the same exact degree of Leo 5 degrees, leading me to believe that if you didn’t raise him alone then he saw his parents as one unshakable unit.

Chances are by this chart that there was a troublesome marriage and a divorce that led him to feel a bit lost. And he felt you were not very compassionate to his feelings of loss. I’m thinking with Uranus trining his Venus and part of fortune he may have come around later and understood things, that perhaps, what was done was for his benefit, but it’s the unconscious stuff he can’t shake.

Also with Aquarius on the cusp of his 7^th house he probably has a tendency toward partnerships (both professional and romantic) that are odd or unusual, perhaps role reversals, and with people who tend to bring out the worst in him (Uranus conjuncts his south node, again past life karma that is difficult).

However there is hope for him. He has Jupiter conjunct Capricorn in the 5^th house and Neptune close in Sag there as well, meaning over the next couple of years there’s a good chance he will go through a positive transformation either through having a child or through some sort of creative endeavor. Encourage a creative outlet for him, he desperately needs it. He actually would be a fine actor or writer with Mercury in Virgo in the 1^st house. Even if this endeavor doesn’t pay his bills to start with, he has a lot to work through and needs to do it through working with his creative/emotional side.

He also maybe quite musical with Neptune conjunct Jupiter in the 5^th so perhaps it will be through music that he finds his way. There are a lot of potential creative things he could do, he’s actually very talented in this way, although he may hide it (all those planets in the 12^th). I would really encourage him to put his energy into his creative side, it will really help him to sort through what he needs to in order to move forward.

I have to say that a normal life, like one your other children may have, this sort of life is not for him right now. He needs to explore himself and be creative. Be thankful – his chart could lead him into much worse trouble than he is in – (I won’t go into that because I don’t want you to be worried as I don’t feel that he’s on that level.)

He will find his way through some encouragement. It might be a good idea for him to live somewhere else for a while, somewhere he can explore his creativity. He really needs positive guidance. He’s young. It’s best for him to learn to trust his intuition, support that in him as it will keep him out of trouble. Otherwise if he lives in the fear it will cripple his development.

Hope this helped. Let us know how you and your family are doing either via e-mail or by posting to the blog.

Many blessings to you and your family,

Denise

OK, A Quick Response to an Absurd Comment

Mrs. Anti-Virus drmasoncolon.insanejournal.com/662.html nospam816@aol.com 96.247.181.94

Answering Readers…

Question number 2:

Denise: I think I’m supposed to write a book. Can you feel the subject matter?    Thanks.

I didn’t have a time of birth for this question but I rely often on guides and was told this person was born in the evening at 10:33 PM so I ran the chart for that time. Whether this is the person’s “real” birth time or not is irrelevant it is the one this person’s people wanted me to have in order to answer the question.

Interestingly, Gemini is on the 10th house cusp in this chart and Virgo is rising – both signs that rule writing! With so many planets in the 11th house in Leo and Cancer this makes me think the persons main interest (in terms of writing at least) is in the greater good, the big picture and in organizations. It also means that this is the place of hopes and wishes (the Aquarian house). The Leo and Cancer show a flair for the dramatic and for nurturing others through larger means rather than through traditional means like having a family.

In other words this person’s purpose is to connect with the collective unconscious and communicate it in a dramatic way. Interestingly, this person has Moon in Capricorn opposite their Sun in Cancer. And Mercury is nataly conjunct the Sun, again indicating writing talent and a need to communicate. With the opposition of the Moon and Sun, there’s a very good chance that this person has suffered from depression or has put aside their higher purpose to fit in, to get by and is now feeling the urge to turn this around as Pluto enters the sign of their Moon and will eventually conjunct it leaving this person completely transformed especially (since it’s in the 5th house) in their creative endeavors.By the way this transformation will not happen over night Pluto moves very slowly so the sooner this person gets to work on their greater purpose of writing, the bigger and better (more positive as well) this transformation will be, meaning they could become very famous, successful, win awards or if they continue to doubt themselves they might spend the next ten years putting off their purpose and finally be forced into a lesser version of what their potential is.

I think this person should focus on writing fiction (or narrative non-fiction) with all that dramatic Leo energy. Subjects that would be most fruitful will have to do with family, kids, childhood, nurturing, and with the Moon’s depositor being in the third house in Sagittarius, other cultures would also be another element that would be fruitful and engaging. It also trines nearly all this person’s planets in Leo, reinforcing the ease it would be for this person to write about their travels, foreign cultures and perhaps promote greater understanding between our culture and other cultures – like a young adult novel about a kid that moves into the Mid-West from India and has to adjust to an entirely foreign culture and still manages to learn to fit in and make friends, and understand this new very different world. I’d think that would be a jumping off point. There’s a lot more in the chart I’m noticing now that reinforces this person’s love of other cultures and unique perspectives, Jupiter is also in Virgo in the first house, meaning this person often identifies with people from other places and traveling is restorative for them. Perhaps if this person can’t afford to go to a foreign country for inspiration then read and research one for now! And save your money for a trip abroad!

Hope that helps.

Denise

PS. For the next posting I’m going to abandon the question number thing because I’m getting flooded with questions and it’s becoming confusing for me. You will know, since the questions are all very different from one another. If you’re not sure you can e-mail me and I’ll confirm if I was indeed answering your question.